12 December

1. 12 December! All my civil servant friends have been waiting for this day to see a 5-figure sum in their bank accounts but oh no, not me. I am just a lowly civil servant on unpaid leave.

2. Guess what I had just now for dinner? Mee Goreng Mama. Then I remembered that I swore off MGM (that's my affectionate nickname for my all-time favourite food) just last week. But, well, the stomach had a mind of its own and insisted on MGM. Of course, now, I can't sleep because my stomach is all bloated. I'm not sure when I started developing this reaction to MGM. When I was a poor little girl growing up in a large household, treats meant eating out at hawker centres. I would always order MGM (I don't remember ordering anything else). Sometimes, my father would come back late and around 10-ish, he'd call home and ask if we were still up. If we were, he would come back with a few packs of MGM. See? MGM is such a great part of my life. How then is it possible for my body to react this way when I eat MGM? Huuuuaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggghhhh!

3. My bloated tummy makes me look like I'm 4 months pregnant. Sucking it in does not completely flatten the tummy. Despite what I make myself out to be, I'm a bit vain and I cant stand seeing my bloated self in the mirror so when I'm in front of the mirror, I normally suck in my tummy.

4. Talking about pregnancy - one of the few things I enjoy about being pregnant is that I have an extremely good reason to have a tummy and I dont have to control what I eat (the way I do when I'm not pregnant) just so that the tummy wont show. Then again, when I'm pregnant, I have zero appetite and can't keep much in my tummy. All the food I eat will be jostling among themselves to see who can come out first.

5. I had a great time meeting old friends in the past 2 weeks! I love it! I'm gonna catch up with a couple more friends in the coming weeks. Hoooray!

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Enough about me already!

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About the kids now...

1. Farah and Huda are so lovable. At times (must put disclaimer). Say, I scold A and A cries. B will go to A and hug A. Cute. Both of them do it to each other as long as the person who made them cry is not one of them. Of course, if Farah made Huda cry, both would refuse to hug the other. It only works if they have a common enemy.

Just now, we were late for our dentist appointment so TheHusband and Huda went up to the waiting area to register first. I took some time with Farah (who is at this point, keen on inspecting every single thing around her). Throughout the short journey to the third floor where the dentist is, Farah kept on asking, "Ne Ayah? (Mana ayah? Where's Ayah?) Ne Tatak Tuta? (Mana Kakak Huda? Where's Kakak Huda?)"

Finally, we reached the third floor. The moment she saw her Ayah and Kakak Huda, she screamed out for them. Huda ran to her and they hugged each other, as if they have not seen each other for days.

2. And then, there are exasperating moments because Farah dearest has entered the Terrifying Twos stage although she's not 2 yet. NO is not an answer she wants to hear. Even if it's couched in the most delicate of phrases, it's still not pleasant to her ears. She will respond this way:
a. pick a spot on the floor and lie down
b i. wail
b ii. hit the floor repeatedly with her arms and legs
b iii. roll around
b iv. arch her back; straighten it again
b v. wail (oh, I've mentioned it already?)
(b i - b v   happen simultaneously)

This happens on a regular basis. And she doesn't care where we are. It has happened in friends' homes, in buses (she was strapped in her baby carrier so her movements were limited), in her stroller (strapped in, so limited movements), everywhere.

I normally leave her alone when this happens. Sometimes, however, she chooses to display her vocal prowess and physical strength in unsafe places such as inside the toilet. So, in such situations, I'll throw her inside her playpen so that she can release her frustration (I'm simply using polite phrases here) in a safe place.

I read various literature on handling tantrums and most agree that waiting it out is a pretty standard practice. However, I realised recently that I'm also supposed to validate her concerns. That, apparently, is the missing component in my tantrum management standard operating procedure. So I've been telling her in my ultra calm voice when she is exercising her vocal chords things like, "You are feeling upset because I do not want you jumping down from the sofa while holding on to my bunch of keys which you have taken from my bag without my permission. Later, when you are feeling better, we'll do something which I feel is safer and more age-appropriate."

I'm still new to this validating exercise. At this point, it sounds like a very wimpy thing to do. Parents in the past would just smack their children hard and that's that. But living in this new-age world, we need new-age tactics to handle children.

It also seems like this validating thing is good for future use. I read this book on child-raising recently (I think it's called 'You Can't Duct-Tape Your Child') and when you have pre-teens and angsty teenagers, validating their concerns will help in keeping the lines of communication open. So, from now til then, I better work harder on the validating. It will be some time before I truly believe in it, though. It's a good thing that I'm starting when these kids are impressionable and believe everything that I say.

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I'm stopping here for now because it's almost 1am and I must force myself to sleep despite the bloatedness I'm feeling. I'm gonna make sure that the next entry I write will be kid-centric. Tataaaa!